PornHub Teen review

The site is so good that I even use it when I’m too lazy to cruise down to the high school and pick up whatever hot piece of meat I see with an ass just a little bit too big for her tiny jean shorts. Sure, it’s not quite the same as having a pristine virgin or a slutty cheerleader servicing your cock and begging for your load, but I understand that not everyone is as lucky as I am. Some people fuck, and others get fucked. So unless you’re willing to risk getting a restraining order taken against you and spending the rest of your life on the sex offender’s registry by trying to copy me and pick up teenage girls (it won’t work for you, I promise), this is your next best bet.

The site has been around forever, and seasoned masturbators like yourself should probably know it well. But a lot of people have been overlooking it in recent years. It’s been around forever, and some people think that means that better alternatives have been created, so they’ve given up on it and moved on. And while I understand the logic behind doing so, it doesn’t hold true in this case. Your mom’s been around for a while too, and I haven’t given up on her yet, so why would you give up on PornHub? Sure, she might not be quite as hot as she used to be, but there’s something to be said about being desperate for cock.

Maybe if you’re lucky, you’ll even be able to pick up some techniques from the site’s videos that you’ll be able to use on an actual living, breathing, teen girl. I am just joking. Sorry to get your hopes up. I know that the only way an eighteen-year-old slut would gargle your nuts like she does mine would be if you paid her, and I also know you can’t afford that on your minimum-wage fast-food salary. Plus, the smell of burgers and fries that lingers on your greasy forehead would probably turn her off to the point of vomiting anyways.